Hello Sweet Cheer: May 2016


All the Feels

Shout out to all the mamas who made it to 39 weeks pregnant...40 weeks pregnant...41 weeks pregnant...past 41 weeks pregnant...!

     This has been one of the most physically, spiritually and emotionally challenging times in my adult life! It is full of ups and downs and I think that's what makes it seem so full of difficulty. Yet it's also been the most joyful time in my life, how am I supposed to handle all of that?! ;)

     Today marks 39 weeks of pregnancy. To be completely honest, I hoped I would have delivered by now. My mama had her first baby at 38 weeks and as much as I tried not to count on that to be my story as well, I was disappointed when I passed her up. Before I get too far into this post, I want to say that I have truly loved being pregnant. There is nothing I have wanted more my entire existence than to be married to the love of my life, carrying our child, and preparing for motherhood. I am truly living my dream! And I have no complaints. I am so happy with where Ryan and I are in our walks with Jesus, in Ryan's career, in our marriage, etc. We are in such a sweet spot right now! With that said, I do want to share and talk about all that has gone on in me over the last three weeks; the good, the bad and the ugly!

     When I made it to 36 weeks, it felt like we were at the finish line! I felt like I was so close to delivery, no matter when it happened and I was ready to meet my son. I've obviously been so excited to meet him ever since the day I knew he existed - but at 36 weeks I was READY to meet him. I was ready to endure the pain of labor and delivery, ready to experience sleepless nights, ready to see my baby face to face. I knew once I got to 37 weeks that we were good to go and baby could come at any moment! Now, did I think I would deliver in the 37th week? Not necessarily. But the idea that it was good and okay for him to come that week made me even more ready. And then we made it to 38 weeks. And I was really really ready. I tried not to count on delivering that week, but to be completely honest, I was convinced I would. At this point I had been through 2 weeks of cramping, lots of mild/painless contractions and the anticipation that those feelings could at any time turn into real labor.

     And that brings us to today. May 31st, 2016...I am officially 39 weeks pregnant. I was really hoping for a May baby. And it looks like he will definitely be our little June Bug. And that's okay.

     I have prayed and prayed that the Lord would end the waiting and allow me to have this baby. Every night I ask God to wake me up in painful contractions that get longer, stronger and closer together. I have pleaded with him to let me have my boy in my arms sooner than later. And His plans are greater than any desire or idea I have for myself. As I was driving home from the grocery store this morning, a song I love came on. I turned it way up and started singing as I usually do. And before I knew it I was bawling. The words in the song are powerful and I was so convicted.

They say this...

Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will

I know You see me
I know You hear me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Goodness You have in store
I know You hear me
I know You see me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Goodness You have in store

     As I listened and cried and sang out the Lord, I realized how selfish I have been. I have essentially demanded the Lord allow me to meet my child, I have been impatient, I have stomped my feet every morning when I wake up still pregnant. I have said to the Lord, my plan is better, this is MY son and I want to meet him now.

     And the reality is that this baby belongs completely to God, and He has his birthdate and time picked out for exactly when He wants. His will is going to be done - whether I accept that or not. His plans are good and perfect and like the song says, they are for me. I can't help but think about the fact that in all this, I've been so focused on having this baby and the Lord has been slowly, sweetly, gently drawing my heart closer and closer to His.

I am so undeserving, so sinful and wicked, yet my Savior loves me and still wants my heart. That is the hope and truth I am clinging to today and every day!

Sorry for the long-windedness...if you made it this far, I'm impressed! Leave me a comment and let me know. Is this something the Lord has taught you at some point in life? Are you still learning it like me? I hope these words are encouraging and life giving.

xoxo || meredith holguin


38 week bumpdate

How far along: 38 weeks

Size of babe: 19.75 in, size of a winter melon, almost 7 pounds!

Gender: IT'S A BOY!! We can't wait to meet our son, Titus Matthew!

Husband: He is the sweetest. He usually texts me during the day to ask how I'm feeling, if I'm having contractions, etc. He is so ready to meet his son!

Maternity Clothes: Still rocking' Ryan's clothes, nike shorts, maxi dresses... just trying to stay as cool and comfortable as possible!

Loving: Feeling his head super low...I'm telling myself it's a good sign!

Loathing: Nothing really, just playing a waiting game!

Belly Button: Basically out!

Movement: So much!

Symptoms: Waking up in the middle of the night for no reason, lots of contractions and cramping, still peeing constantly...

Best Part of the Week: Ryan's work threw us a little shower today!!! It was so so sweet, and we felt so loved! AND we finished baby boy's nursery! If you missed that post you can check it out here!

Worst Part of the Week: Allergies...this is about the time of the year that they act up for me so that's no fun!

Missing Most: Being able to move freely! The belly restricts me when I'm washing dishes, sitting at the table, etc.

Can't wait for: This baby to be in my arms!!


A Very Foxy Nursery Reveal

Happy Monday! I hope everyone had a great weekend! Ryan and I had a super fun and productive one - we finally finished every detail of Titus' nursery! And I am so excited to share it with you.

The first thing you see is the diaper wreath made by Titus' Libby (my mom). We love everything about it, it truly sums up his room as a whole! On the wall to the right are his bookshelves and closet. I also have his rock'n'play on that wall but it will move around the house once he's here! Eventually I'd like to have a few oversized pillows on the floor under the shelves to create a little reading area!

Next, I want to turn your attention to the recliner. This is a piece of furniture I've had for about the last four years, originally given to me as a hand me down from my parents, who it was given to by my grandparents. It is a La-Z-Boy, it rocks, swivels and has a footrest that pops up. This thing is in excellent condition for it's age (and so comfortable) which is why we decided to use it in this room. Not to mention we saved ourselves a couple hundred bucks by using a piece we already had! It is a dingy blue color (from years of wear and tear) so we just threw a cover on it to brighten it up and called it good! 

Also in this photo you see his hamper on the right, a sweet fox pillow, a small side table for mama's things, and these sweet, simple curtains hand sewn by Libby! (by the way, that side table was on sale for about half it's current price when we ordered it - score!)

 Here is his sweet crib filled with so many precious stuffed animals (yes I will remove them when he starts sleeping there), a name banner from one of my showers made by my bestie Jessica, and you can see our birth bag and diaper bag over on the left! 

Here you can see the curtains again, I just love them so much! And here is the dresser we ended up with - gifted to us by our sweet Grandma Maria (Titus' great grandma). I have the Burt's Bees changing pad cover in blueberry, the Dekor diaper pail, the OXO Tot wipe dispenser, a wire basket to store diapers, a classic favorite book and a sweet pair of shoes that were a gift. Above the dresser is a chalkboard I made, a metal 'T' and two sonogram photos. I will eventually switch those out for pictures of his sweet face!

This photo shows the rug we decided on. It just covers the area right in front of the dresser and I love it! I had originally picked out something much bigger that was red and white. And I love that rug, but it was too big and just didn't work in this little room once we had everything in place. It's definitely a great rug though so we'll be saving it for a future bedroom or play room!

And in this corner I have three stackable wooden bins. We've got have extra diapers there for now but I envision them to be toy bins one day, maybe for a future play room! Love them!

You probably notice an empty space on the wall! My mom is bringing something for that spot when she comes for the birth. I'm excited to see how it works there!

For context, our bedroom is just across the hall - which is super convenient.

     And because nothing is complete without this pup - here's a sweet photo. He loves this room (I find him laying in here alone from time to time) and I just know he will do great when little boy does finally arrive! I tried to link as many things as possible but if you have any questions about where things came from, feel free to find me on any of my social media accounts or shoot me an email! Also,  there are a ton of things in this room that were gifts - so if you gave us something in here, thank you!! We could not have completed this space without so many thoughtful gifts from friends and family. 

     I truly love how this room turned out. My vision for it evolved over the months we worked on it, shopped for it, added things and took things away! But my biggest goal was for it to be light, bright and welcoming and I think we accomplished that! Thank you to my sweet, precious husband who painted the room, built all the furniture, helped me hang shelves and frames, etc. You are already dad of the year in my eyes, boo! 

Have a great week, friends!

xoxo || meredith holguin


36 week bumpdate

     How am I already doing my THIRTY-SIX week bumpdate?! I truly feel like we just found out we were pregnant and I was dreaming about all the fun and preparation that was to come! And now we are somewhere between ONE and FIVE weeks away from delivery!! How can that be? 

     On the other hand, I am so ready to meet my precious son. I can't believe I'm going to be someone's mama...forever! I have spent so many days lately just thinking about Titus and who he will become. I am just beside myself when I think of all the possibilities; what sport will he like, will he be a social butterfly like mom and dad or will he be more shy, will he love to play with trucks or rocks or legos? I love him so much already, I can't even imagine what will happen to my heart when I finally hold him in my arms!

     In other less sappy news, I am doing lots of pelvic rocks, trying to spend more time on the floor than the couch, staying as active as I can and drinking my pregnancy and red raspberry leaf tea! I'm hoping these things will keep baby in the right position and get my body ready to deliver!! I'm also getting close to finishing packing my birth bag (which I will do a post on), I'm waiting on a few things from Amazon and then we will be ready to go! Also, be on the lookout for a Nursery Reveal sometime in the near future! Again, still waiting on a few things but we are getting close!

On to the questionnaire!

How far along: 36 weeks

Size of babe: Head of romaine lettuce! About 20 inches long and close to 6 pounds!

Gender: IT'S A BOY!! We can't wait to meet our son, Titus Matthew!

Husband: My sweet husband is so so excited. He is going to be the best daddy!

Maternity Clothes: Ryan's clothes....and mostly just big t-shirts! I'm waiting on these gems to come from Amazon, I've heard they're great for nursing and just post-partum in general! I ordered it in black and gray! I am also about to go purchase a few new pairs of Nike shorts. I haven't worn them in years but I need something comfy and cool for these super warm days! And I'm sure they'll come in handy post-partum as well.

Loving: Dreaming about holding my boy in my arms! I have really enjoyed picturing the moments after his birth!

Loathing: Nothing really, just playing a waiting game!

Belly Button: Still halfway out!

Movement: Constant!

Symptoms: Still lots of emotions and waking up in the middle of the night to contractions now. I've had a lot more lately so I'm praying that is a good sign of labor!

Best Part of the Week: Getting our carseat and stroller! And finishing up getting some things off of our registry! And my first (almost) mother's day!

Worst Part of the Week: Nothing, I am so so excited and ready for this boy!

Missing Most: Range of motion...this belly is a little restricting ;)

Can't wait for: This baby to be in my arms!!

Also, check out Ryan's YouTube channel! He posts new vlogs every Tuesday!

xoxo || meredith holguin


To My Mama

     This year on Mother's Day, I'm feeling extra sentimental... I'll let you guess why! 

     As I sit here with my son in my belly, I'm thinking back on all the sweet memories I have with my mom and feeling incredibly grateful for her place in my life. And looking so forward to the memories I'll create as I become a mother in just a few short weeks! What a sweet time of preparation I'm in!

     As a little girl, I have the most vivid memories of sitting with my mama. I remember her always letting me sit in her lap, hug her neck and love on her. I've always been one for physical touch and my parents definitely fulfilled that with all the precious times we cuddled on the couch or before bed. I am so thankful for her hugs. And I think as an adult they mean even more to me. I love getting big hugs from her every time I see her!

     My mom has always had a kind heart. She is a mother who walks so deeply in every emotion each of her children are feeling. This is something I am so grateful for in her. She has walked with me through intense joy and intense sorrow in many seasons of life. Her compassion is bigger than I can even describe. This is something so unique about the way the Lord created my mom and I am so so grateful for it.

     Another thing I truly love about my mom is how caring she is. As much as my sisters and I give her a hard time about worrying and constantly being concerned about things that seem minute... I know it is a quality in her that comes from how much she cares about others. I feel like it's a quality that I have gained from watching her love and care for our family over the last 23 years!

     I get to share two really cool loves with my mom. We share the love of dance/drill team and we share the love of Texas Tech! Drill team was my world in high school and when that ended I moved on to Texas Tech where we continued to share a love for the stage of life I was in. It's such a special thing for me to share these two things with my mama. She was on drill team and served as a student leader in the same way I did and I loved having her to talk to throughout that entire experience. She understood what I was going through in a way no one else did. And we still share our love for Texas Tech, and always will! Football season is a lot of fun when we're together! 

     My mom has always taught me about Jesus. She loves the Lord and without her guidance I wouldn't have had such a great example of what a godly woman, wife and mother looks like. I can't explain what a treasure it is to have a mama who knows the same Savior I do! Not to mention she has taught me about him and raised me up in the way I should go. She prays for me, she encourages me and leads her life as a living example of what I strive for every day.

     This Mother's Day I'm more thankful than I think I've ever been. I am excited about transitioning into motherhood with the greatest example of what a mother is, in my own mama! 

I can't wait for Titus to meet his Libby!!


     Another reason why this Mother's Day is so special is because this is the second year I get to celebrate my wonderful mother-in-law!

     There are so many things I love about her. She loves me like I am her own daughter and she makes me feel so apart of the family. I am so thankful and grateful for her sweet spirit and how excited she is for Ryan and I in every season we go through. I know our sweet boy, Titus, will be so blessed to have her as his grandma! Of course I am MOST grateful to her for giving birth to the little boy who would one day grow up to be my husband! Because of her, I get to have the love of my life, and I can't thank her enough for that!

To all the mamas and mamas-to-be, Happy Mother's Day - I hope you feel honored, loved and treasured today.

xoxo || meredith holguin